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ly, when it was too late. We had taken the old man to
the hospital and I had tended him, my friend. Now there
was nothing more that I could do except see that he had
burial of the type that he would want to have, and to see
too that his aged wife was freed from want.
I lovingly closed his eyes, the eyes that would no longer
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gaze at me quizzically as I plied him with questions. I made
sure that the bandage was tight around his jaws so that his
mouth would not sag, the mouth that had given me so much
encouragement, so much teaching in Chinese and Chinese
history, for it had been my wont to call upon the old man
of an evening, to take him little things, and to talk with
him as one man to another. I drew the sheet over him and
straightened up. The day was far advanced. It was long
past the hour at which I should have left, for I had been
on duty for more than seventeen hours, trying to help,
trying to cure.
I made my way up the hill, past the shops so brightly
lighted, for it was dark. I went on past the last of the
houses. The sky was cloudy. Below in the harbor the water
had been lashing up at the quay side and the ships were
rocking and tossing at their moorings.
The wind moaned and sighed through the pine trees as
I walked along the road toward the lamasery. For some
reason I shivered. I was oppressed with a horrid dread. I
could not get the thought of death out of my mind. Why
should people have to die so painfully? The clouds over
head scurried swiftly by like people intent on their business
obscuring the face of the moon, blowing clear, allowing
shafts of moonlight to illuminate the dark fir trees. Then
the clouds would come together again and the light would
be shut off, and all would be gloomy, and dark, and fore-
boding. I shivered.
As I walked along the road my footsteps echoed hollowly
in the silence, echoed as if someone were following me close
behind. I was ill at ease, again I shivered and drew my robe
more tightly around me. "Must be sickening for something,
I said to myself. I really feel most peculiar. Can't think
what it can be. Just then I came to the entrance of the
little path through the trees, the little path which led up the
hill to the lamasery. I turned right, away from the main
road. For some moments I walked along until I came to a
little clearing at the side of the path where a fallen tree had
brought others crashing down. Now, one was flat upon the
ground and the others lay at crazy angles. I think I'll sit
down for a moment. Don't know what's happened to me.
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I said to myself. With that I turned into the clearing and
looked for a clean place upon the trunk of a tree. I sat
down and tucked my robes around my legs to protect me
from the chill wind. It was eerie. All the small sounds of
the night broke in upon me, queer shudders, squeaks, and
rustles. Just then scurrying clouds overhead parted, and a
brilliant beam of moonlight flooded into the clearing, illum-
inating all as if in the clearest day. It seemed strange to me,
light, moonlight as bright as that, as bright as the brightest
sunlight. I shivered, then jumped to my feet in alarm. A
man was approaching through the trees at the other side
of the clearing. I stared in utter incredulity. It was a Tibetan
lama. A lama was coming toward me with blood pouring
from his chest, staining his robes, his hands too were
covered with blood, dripping red. He walked toward me,
and I reeled back and almost tripped over the bole of a tree.
I sank down and sat in terror. Lobsang, Lobsang, are you
afraid of ME? a well-known voice exclaimed. I stood up,
rubbed my eyes, and then rushed toward that figure. Stop!
he said. You cannot touch me. I have come to say goodbye
to you, for this day I have finished my span upon the earth,
and I am about to depart. Shall we sit and talk? I turned,
humbly, heart-broken, stunned, and resumed my seat upon
the fallen tree. Overhead the clouds whirled by, the leaves
of the trees rustled, a night bird flitted overhead intent only
on food, upon prey, oblivious to us, and our business.
Somewhere at the end of the trunk upon which we sat some
small creature of the night rustled and squeaked as it turned
over rotting vegetation in search of food. Here in this
desolate clearing, wind-swept, and bleak, I sat and talked
with a ghost, the ghost of my Guide, the Lama Mingyar
Dondup, who had returned from beyond Life to talk to me.
He sat beside me as he had sat beside me so many times
before away in Lhasa. He sat not touching me, perhaps
three yards' distance from me. Before you left Lhasa,
Lobsang, you asked me to tell you when my span upon
earth had finished. My span has now finished. Here I am.
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I looked at him, the man I knew above all others. I looked
at him and I could hardly believe even with all my ex-
perience of such things that this man was no longer of the
flesh, but a spirit, that his silver cord had been severed, and
the golden bowl shattered. He looked to me to be solid,
entire, as I had known him. He was dressed in his robes, in
his brick red cassock with the golden cloak. He looked
tired as if he had traveled far and painfully. I could see
well that for a long time past he had neglected his own
welfare in the service of others. How wan he looks, I
thought. Then he partly turned, in a habit that I so well
remembered, and as he did so I saw, a dagger in his back.
He shrugged slightly and settled himself, and faced me. I
froze with horror as I saw that the point of the dagger was
protruding from his chest, and the blood had poured from
the wound, had run down and saturated the golden robe.
Before it had been as a blur to me, I had not taken in the
details, I had just seen a lama with blood on his chest,
blood on his hands, but now I was gazing more closely.
The hands I saw were blood-stained where he had clutched
himself as the dagger came through his chest. I shivered
and my blood ran cold within me. He saw my gaze, he saw
the horror in my face, and he said, I came like this
deliberately, Lobsang, so that you could see what hap-
pened. Now that you have seen me thus, see me as I am.
The blood-stained form vanished in a flash, a flash of
golden light, and then it was replaced by a vision of sur-
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